Expressing myself in writings

You never know the value of what you have now until you lose them.

That really holds true for me as well: as soon as I am given wonderful things, I start to take them for granted. I no longer appreciate the core values that all those things have; at times I even complain when things start to happen differently from what I actually want. Like now. I can say I am losing everything that I can possibly lose, until there’s nothing left.

Staying in hall unveils a whole new world before me: I learn new things, I meet new friends, I am exposed to different cultures, and so on, and so on. Yet, even at the start I failed to recognize that this is actually the place for me. I kept on imagining myself staying across the road–my friends are there, my community is there. One year is more than enough for me to be blindfolded and, again, choosing the wrong choice, for the thousandth time in my life.

Once I decided to leave hall and seek for new opportunities, there came the tsunami of “good news” from my friends. They get in to different committees; they move to a novel, promising place where the community seems really exciting and, well, vibrant; they continue to be involved in hall. Me? Here, I am standing on the crossroad, desperately looking for direction. Decided to leave hall but hoped that someday another opportunity to be in hall again might come. And joining no committees to date.

Really, I made a mistake again. I should not have trusted my instinct to leave hall.